Sunday, January 20, 2008

WTF? The college experience...

WTF is that?
I did a quick Google search of the college experience, and got back answers like, "The College Experience, A Blueprint for Success" to, "Does the college experience damage your brain?" and, "Alcohol and Your College Experience - Facts on Tap"
and in case you're wondering, I'm (unsurprisingly) going to community college in the fall. This'll be interesting won't it?
Maybe it's because I (and most, if not all of my friends,) actually know how to do laundry, cook, wash dishes, have held down a job or two (or a few) or because I have no interest in drinking, smoking, weed, sororities or frat parties that "The College Experience" just feels like a lame, overdone, Hollywood cliche to me.
Hell, a lot of the "should of's" in life have come and gone for me, and I still don't feel like I'm really missing out on anything.
My 15th birthday came and went, I had a small party, some called it a quince, (it really wasn't,) Nothing fancy really, just lame 70's music to entertain my parents, a nice cake, and a table for some of my friends- and a lot of other people's kids, that I wasn't really familiar with. Only one of the kids that I invited from school showed up. (and I invited tons of people.) But a lot of people I knew outside of school showed up. My friends and I had a great time, mostly talking and laughing. Sure, I kicked out this boy that was pissing me off, and I later ended up apologizing for it, but that was the first and last big moment of "drama" over any boy I can remember.
After that my sixteenth birthday came and went with absolutely no party, not even a present because my family and I were tight for money. A week later I got a small birthday cake from the grocery store, my family and I sang happy birthday, smiled for the camera a couple times, hugged, then ate cake. It was great. :D
Even though, like I said my family had been going through some financial troubles, I still felt like I was having some of the best times ever. I had recently got my dog Pancho (as a puppy back then.) I had recently gotten ribbons for participation and an honorable mention at my school's first science fair, and then an invitation to the Utah State Science fair, where I also won many awards and an honorable mention as well. Earlier that year I had won a blue ribbon in debate and my volunteer club was going great.
Though sure I was sad when I found out we were leaving for az and felt a little out of place during my jr year at a different high school I coped, got good grades and went on to this year, where I have "coasting grades." (c's which is why I didn't get accepted into the University of Utah.- but hey, I got into community college!)
Now I'm 18 never had a bf, never been kissed, never been to a crazy party, don't have a car and I don't feel like I've missed out on anything really.
I've traveled all up and down the west coast, from Yellowstone to Yosemite, and met lots of cool people. I love going to the movies (I've seen American Gangster like 3 times!) and I love going to Barns and Nobel's and reading weird books about secrete societies and listening to talk radio (Michael Savage, Dr. Laura, NPR, Love Line, and Coast to Coast Am are the best)
I love photography, art, music, religion, quotes, history, literature, sight seeing, animals (especially my fat dog) -I just love life, and I don't feel like my lack of one night stands, or kegger's has kept me from enjoying it one bit.

What's more, I don't even see myself as having a "typical" future.
I don't want to get married and have 3.5 kids and a house with a picket fence in middle America, suburbia.
I also don't want to be a tattoo clad, vegetarian, chain smoking, lesbian, atheist, hippie. And yes, there is something wrong with that.
I want to be a pro-life feminist. I want to travel the world and take pictures. I want to adopt a little 10 year old kid,(I know I can't change diapers or stand babies.)sometime in my life- somewhere down the line....WAY down the line, definitely not in my twenties or even thirties for that matter.
I plan to reserve those years to traveling, taking pictures, working hard, doing yoga, playing with my dog, learning to play piano better, learning to dance flamenco and most importantly loving my family, and who knows- maybe if times allows, having a fling here and there.
I want to die and be unknown, I want to fade away like a fallen star. Only those who saw it will remember it and care.
When I die, I every single organ to be donated- from my skin to my brain.
and the rest can be burned and thrown anywhere overlooking the ocean, hopefully during a sunset. That'll be my funeral.
I don't have any particular glamorous view of life. I don't expect to be rich, and I don't want to live in poverty. I just want to be happy. Then I want my family to be happy. Then I want to make my community better.
And I know these are not things that can simply be done and that they take a long time to achieve, but that's what life is for, and thats what I'm here for.

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